SADNESS AND DESIRE
After her classes Deanna stopped by Harry and Laura’s apartment, but he wasn’t there. She found a worried and somewhat sad Laura; so she just listened to her. She wasn’t going to tell her how well things were going with Daniel if her friend was in that state. Laura told her that Harry was distancing himself more and more from her, that he was still the same sweet and considerate man, but that it seemed that he only cared about the baby and his job. “How strange,” Deanna thought, they were always so in love with each other. Maybe it would be a time of adjustment for Harry.
She arrived at the house a little worried, it was strange to see Laura like that. Maybe the pregnancy was affecting her.
Daniel waited for her a little uneasily, wondering if she saw his brother. Should he live with that anguish forever? Dismayed every time they met?
– How did it go? –
– Fine.
– Did you see Laura? –
– Yeah, I didn’t see her very well. Harry seems to be having a hard time adjusting to his new life –
– I see…
He knew exactly what was wrong with Harry.
– The kids? –
– They’re doing their schoolwork… Do you want me to help you with your stuff? – He was eager.
– No need, I’ll just bring a few things today. Tomorrow with more time I can move the rest –
And all she took from her room was her sleeping clothes, a toothbrush and a comb. He opened the door to let her in first.
The room was much larger than hers, with its own bathroom and little furniture. The same scent of oak and sandalwood.
-You can put your clothes in here tomorrow,” He opened a side door leading to the dressing room.
He had cleared hangers and shelves, drawers and made room in the shoe rack.
– You were busy while I was gone –
– Yeah, I thought you’d bring everything in today –
– Thank you… – For Deanna it was a sweet gesture on his part.
Sometimes he acted totally different from his temperament. Maybe the real Daniel was that other one, the one who had details and tender words and not the indifferent one.
She walked through the bathroom and the rest of the room.
On his bedside table were some photographs, among them one of Emily. Deanna picked it up and looked at it for a while.
– I’m sorry, I didn’t realize… give it to me, I’m going to store it away.
– Why? –
– It’s your room too, I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable –
– You don’t have to store it, I don’t feel uncomfortable… She was very pretty, Naomi looks very much like… –
– Yeah, Ethan too –
– That’s true, but I think he’s more like you. Serious and gentlemanly –
– Next month is a new anniversary… – He told her thoughtfully.
– What do you do on that day? –
– We usually take her flowers… I’m sorry… –
– She’s the mother of your children, there’s nothing to apologize for –
– Ethan and Naomi still miss her… Jonathan I don’t think he remembers her too much… –
– Do you? –
– Yes… –All content © N/.ôvel/Dr/ama.Org.
He stared at her, stunned, and there it was: the sadness. Deanna could feel it; that gray shadow that sometimes overshadowed his brown eyes was the memory of Emily. She left the photograph where it was and turned to hug him. For a few moments Daniel was surprised, but then he hid his face in her neck and hugged her too. No one could replace Emily in his heart, but she could take a new place in it.
She wanted him to know that she was there for him, that she would be there for him even when he was feeling sad or down. Daniel had never mentioned anything about it, and she hadn’t asked him. If he wanted to talk to her about Emily, Deanna would listen, but she wasn’t going to pursue him with questioning. Much less seeing the sadness resurface in him at the memory of her.
Jonathan opened the door and rushed into the room, but stopped dead in his tracks when he saw the scene. It was the second time they had been caught that day.
-Today I told your grandmother that my children knock on the door before they come in, you must knock first, son.
But the little boy just looked at him and then at Deanna.
– What’s the matter? – she asked him.
The boy began to walk to where she was standing very slowly and without taking his eyes off his father. Daniel was looking at him in amusement and surprise. What was that look? He hugged Deanna’s legs tightly.
– Hey, I was there,” Daniel said and Deanna laughed.
But Jonathan kept looking at him as if he was warning him to stay away. Susan had guessed right: he had a rival.
-I can’t believe it… Deanna…
She couldn’t stop laughing at the little boy’s attitude.
– Jonathan is definitely more like you than Ethan –
– I don’t look at people like that –
– Oh, of course you do! –
Deanna stretched out her hand for Daniel to take.
– Jonathan, listen to me… – The boy separated a little from her legs and saw the intertwined hands and hid his head again.
– Little gentleman, look at me… I love you very much, with all my heart, but I also love daddy… –
– With all your heart? – Daniel asked.
– Yes, that’s right… I’m not going to love you any less for loving Dad, Ethan and Naomi. It’s just that the love we share with Dad is a little different, but that’s all
Jonathan raised his head to look at her.
-I promise,” she said.
And that seemed to convince him because when he looked at his father again, he no longer had that angry expression on his little face. He smiled at Deanna. Daniel took him in his arms and hugged him tightly.
This family was incomplete, but not empty. She was sure that when the gloom lifted a little more from their hearts the memory of Emily would bring not shadows, but smiles.
After dinner, Deanna walked the children to their rooms, tucked Jonathan in and went to bed; only she would no longer sleep alone. She walked in and found him sitting on the bed, leaning against the back of the bed and reading some papers. Daniel looked at her over the top of his glasses and she smiled.
She went into the bathroom and there was the sound of running water. When she got under the warm water she remembered she hadn’t picked up her shampoo, she would have to use his, but when she looked for it she discovered it on the shelf with all her things. How cute, why was he so changeable, didn’t he realize that those little details made him irresistible?
Daniel couldn’t hold back, he couldn’t. He stepped into the shower making Deanna gasp and immediately wrapped his arms around her from behind grabbing her waist.
– What is it in your family that no one calls before coming in? –
– I couldn’t resist… – And he began to kiss her shoulder – I had to know what your wet skin tastes like… –
The contact of his eager lips sent electricity throughout her body. And when the extension of her shoulder was not enough he continued the path down her neck until he reached under her earlobe. With each kiss their bodies grew closer together.
Deanna stroked his hair and with her other hand she held onto the tiled wall. The water made her body slick, warmer, softer and Daniel burned with the desire to go all over her. One of his hands trailed down her belly to the curve of her hip and followed, brushing her thigh, only to return along the same spot. He caressed every part he could reach with his fingertips, just barely, and her skin bristled.
Soon, between his kisses and his hands, Deanna began to let sounds come out of her mouth; soft at first, then more broken, like choking. Hearing her was awakening a primal part inside him that was becoming harder and harder to contain. It seemed that the reactions he provoked in her resonated like echoes and came back to him, like a shock wave. They fed back to him with sensations. Just as she vibrated she also provoked, she had that primordial instinct that seemed to fit perfectly with his.
She gave herself to all her passions with the same intensity and this man was one of them. In his arms she forgot all modesty, all shame, she felt safe and desired in an irrational way. Her own desire was triggered.