Find Me Alastar

A soft smile crosses his face. “Hello, Em.”

It’s there again, that stupid chemistry. The air crackles between us and I drop my head. I can’t even

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Tabatha takes out her phone and calls someone. “Hey, it’s me.”

She listens and then smiles. “I have someone else who needs a lift home.”

She listens again and Alastar frowns as his eyes flicker between us. “I will take Emerson home,” he

interrupts.

I shake my head. No.

She puts her hand over the phone and shakes her head at him. “You are not going yet. We have too

much to do.”

She puts her arm around me in a reassuring gesture. “She’s not well.”

Alastar steps toward me. “Are you sick?” he whispers.

Yeah, sick of you. “I’ll be fine,” I reply, still unable to make eye contact with him.

He grabs my hand. “What’s wrong?”

My eyes finally meet his and I rip my hand from his grip. “Don’t touch me,” I say sharply.

He steps back and his eyes hold mine. If he didn’t know I am furious with him before, he definitely

knows now. Tabatha gets off the phone and turns to me. “He will meet you up in the main house in about

fifteen minutes. Is that okay?”

I smile. “Thank you so much.” I bend and give her a quick peck on the cheek then turn and take the

stairs. I walk into the house with my heartbeat pounding in my ears.

I just want to get out of here and I feel the perspiration start to creep across my body. I have never

been so uncomfortable in all of my life. I go to the front balcony and take a seat on the bench against the

wall in the silence as I wait for my lift. I take out my phone and text James.

Hi, James. I’ve gone home.

Have a great night.

Em x

I hear the the door jam creak and I turn to see Alastar walk out onto the front porch. I turn back to look

out into the darkness.

“What’s wrong?” he asks.

I don’t answer. I stay silent. I have nothing to say to him.

“Do you need to go to the hospital?” he asks. “I will take you now. I won’t stay.”

I still don’t answer.

“What’s wrong, baby. Talk to me.”

I roll my eyes. Of all the nerve. That’s it, I can’t stand it. “I’m not your baby.”

“Em-”

I cut him off. “Don’t.”

He stays silent.

I keep looking out into the darkness. What is it about this guy? Why in the hell does he affect me like

this? I feel like I can’t breathe.

Please, just go away.

“I need to know you’re okay.”

“I’m fine.”

“Are you in pain?”

“What do you care? Seriously. Go inside, Alastar.”

He doesn’t answer.

We stay silent, me sitting on the chair and him standing, leaning against the wall. We both look out into

the darkness of the property, deep in our own thoughts.

The car pulls up and the driver gets out. “Are you the young lady I am driving?” he calls out.

“Yes, please.” I stand, walk over to the car, and get in without looking back.

Alastar still doesn’t speak.

The car drives off as he watches from his position. I put my head back against the seat and blow out a

depressed breath.

That’s it. Game over.

Alastar

It’s 2am and I pace back and forth outside the front of Emmaline’s building. It’s not the first time I

have been here, and to be honest, it probably won’t be the last.

Much to the disgust of Thomas, I came home from America after only ten days. I needed to be

closer to her.

I’m having second thoughts that I have done the right thing. Every day away from her brings a

new set of doubts. What if it happens, anyway? What am I missing out on because of my fear?

How high of a price am I prepared to pay? My mind is constantly jumping from scenario to

scenario. This could happen if I do… but then this could happen if I don’t.

Nothing could happen at all. What if I am doing all of this for nothing?

Seeing her tonight has brought it to a sickening climax for me. I need to speak to her. I can’t

stand the thought that I hurt her or knowing that she doesn’t want to have anything to do with me.

Fuck, I handled things so badly at the end. I pace back and forth for over an hour with my mind

in turmoil. I stare up at her window, hoping she can see me down on the street, imagining that she

comes down to see me and kisses me as she jumps into my arms, but I know she wouldn’t, even if

she could see me.

I take out my phone and stare at it. I click on her name and scroll through the messages we have

sent each other. I would give anything for one of those goodnight messages right now. I look back up

at her window.

Fuck it. I dial her number.

It rings for a long time. I am just about to hang up.

“Hello,” her sleepy voice whispers.

A smile crosses my face at the sound of her voice. “Hello, Emmaline.”

She pauses. “Alastar.” Her voice is emotionless.

Silence hangs between us as I stand in the darkness.

“You’re okay?” I ask softly.

“Yes.”