I’m Just His Wife

So maybe Ivan hates me and not once did he look at me as a wife it was because of me so everything was ruined with him. By the way, I just continued to leave him. To make her happy, she and Lara.

I slowly closed my eyes. My eyes were tired of crying so much. I don’t want to …

~ ~

“Mommy … wake up. Mommy …” I heard Ice say as she patted my cheek.

I slowly opened my eyes and saw him smiling at me. I smiled a little, right now my son was all I have. Ever since he was born, my life revolves around him, except for Ivan.

I slowly sat up in bed and removed the handkerchief from my forehead. Ice handed me a thermometer so I frowned at her.

“Dad wants to know your temperature.” Ice replied.

I just leaned over and put the thermometer in my right underarm. A few minutes later it rang and I looked at the temperature, 38. 5 I have a fairly high fever.

I handed the thermometer to Ice and told her to come out first so I let her. I picked up my phone from the side table and saw that Mom had a text message.

From: Mom

-Rigella, Ivan told me that you didn’t eat your breakfast and lunch that’s why you’re sick. were you fine?

-end-

I took a deep breath and typed a reply.

To: Mom

-I’m fine now, Mom. I’ll visit you tomorrow. By the way, where were you? were you and Dad at home yet?Belongs to (N)ôvel/Drama.Org.

-end-

I waited for Mom to reply but five minutes later I didn’t receive a reply so I turned off my phone first. I got up and put on my slippers then walked towards the veranda.

I looked at the sky and it was going to be night. I was grabbed by my arm when it blew hard, very cold.

After a while I went back to bed and lay down. I doubled the blanket I was using because I was getting cold.

I accidentally caught sight of Ivan and I’s wedding picture that was framed and hung on the wall. I thought it was gone because when I delivered it here at home, Ivan just took it and said he would throw it away.

I looked at the photo and saw how sweet my smile was while Ivan was just smiling sparingly. And at least, he made an effort to smile there even a little bit.

I was so happy then because I married the man I wanted, wasn’t. I have been married to the man I have loved since we were children.

Maybe he doesn’t remember anymore. I was his child that he rescued in a car that was supposed to run over me. Fortunately, he overtook me immediately. I am Rella and he was VanVan. We couldn’t pronounce each other’s names properly before so that’s what we called each other.

We were very close then, just in case Mom and I left for America because of Dad’s cheating on her. I couldn’t even say goodbye to Ivan then. In my first year of college, he became my schoolmate, so I fell in love with him even more and reached the point where I fell in love with him.

But I can’t be the only one who was happy, he must be too. Maybe, I need to do the right thing.

My memory of the past was shattered when there was a knock on the door. I got up and sat on the bed. I was about to get up and open the door when it suddenly opened.

Ivan was then thrown holding a tray with only food while Ice was smiling at me. They approached me and sat down next to the bed. Ivan set the tray down in front of me. I saw the rice on the plate, tinola on the plate, a glass of milk and water and then a pill of medicine that was the same as the medicine I had taken before.

I looked at Ivan and he only smiled slightly.

“Mom, me and dad cooked that for you!” Ice said cheerfully so I looked up and smiled.

I mouthed ‘thank you” at him and then at Ivan. Ivan was a little surprised but he immediately smiled at me as well.

I just ate quietly and then I took the medicine. Ivan took the tray and said that it would be put away and that he would take Ice to the room.

I lay down on the bed again and stared at the ceiling. Some time later I heard the door open and close. I looked at Ivan who was wearing a white T-shirt and pajamas.

I sighed as he leaned over me and adjusted my blanket. He lay down properly and closed his eyes.

I took a deep breath. This was maybe the time. “Ivan …”

He opened his eyes and looked at me. “Why? Do you need anything?”

I shuddered and felt tears trickle down my left eye. “Ivan … let’s … let’s file an annulment.” I said the reason for his eyes to widen at the same time as the parting of his lips.

Rigella’s POV

“Ivan … let’s … let’s file an annulment.”

Ivan sat up in bed and stared at me in shock. I could see a mixture of astonishment and shock in his eyes. He shook his head and cast a series of spells.

I slowly sat up in bed and smiled at him even though I was already in tears. This time, I will think of him and not myself. This time, I want him to be happy that I am the reason. This time, I want … him to fulfill his mother’s longing for my release.

I wiped away my tears and forced a smile. It hurts me but, I realize we can’t really do it anymore. He will never be able to love me because he loves Lara so much more than I expected.

Slowly his forehead furrowed and his mouth opened. I noticed he wanted to speak but no voice came out of his mouth.

I slowly raised one hand and stroked his cheek. This was the first time I can … not literally but, this was the first time I will touch his cheek in an emotional event.

My weak sobs were disappearing but I still try to smile. I could hardly see his face because my eyes were already dimming because of my tears.

I don’t know but, my mouth opened spontaneously and spoke.

“A … Do you know you’re my first love?” I asked her with a smile and I saw the part of her lip.

I sniffed and spoke again and continued to caress his cheek. “Since we were kids, I’ve wanted you. It’s also possible that … since we were kids, I’ve loved you …”

I like, he also knows something about me because I already know something about him.

“When … when I found out I was carrying your child in my womb, I was probably the happiest woman in the world because … we already have a child of the person I love …” I sobbed but still tried I smile.