Lost Me Gained Regret

It was my child. He must have searched the heavens far and wide before choosing me to be his mom. And here I was, wrestling with the decision to keep him.

Christine gently cleaned my tears, embracing me with a warmth she seldom showed in public. “Why the tears? Your baby’s doing just fine, very well-behaved and tough.”

“Really?” I asked in surprise.

“Of course, it's true. Don’t you believe me? Ask the nurse,” Christine said.

The nurse, who had come in with her, chuckled helplessly. “Don’t just worry about the baby. You hit your head, and though we’ve bandaged the cut on your forehead, we haven’t done a CT scan because of the pregnancy. How do you feel now? Any severe dizziness?”

“I’m okay.” I nodded, feeling only slightly woozy.

“That’s good. Once you finish with the IV, you can go home to rest. Just come back to the hospital if you feel unwell.” While patting my shoulder reassuringly, the nurse added, “Just take care of yourself. That’s the best way to look after your baby.”

With that, she left.

When hearing that, my tense nerves finally relaxed, and I hugged Christine, my whimpers low, crying out all my grievances and frustrations.

Eventually, as my emotions steadied, Christine let go of me, pulled a chair, and sat beside me.

She looked visibly shaken. “You scared the hell out of me, you know? Weren’t you supposed to take Bryant to the cemetery today? Why were you alone in the car? Where’s Bryant?

If the hospital hadn’t called your emergency contact while I was on the phone with you, you’d be here all alone, and nobody would have known if something happened!

I saw the dashcam footage. You could've easily avoided that car with your reflexes, but you didn't. What were you thinking? You could ye killed yourself."

Christine’s voice rose with each word, her eyes reddening, turning away to clean her tears, clearly frightened by the ordeal.Property of Nô)(velDr(a)ma.Org.

I wanted to calm her down, to assure her I was okay. But all I could muster was a faint, “Chris, I’ve made up my mind.”

Christine looked at me, puzzled. “What?”

“I want a divorce.” I exhaled deeply, feeling a sense of relief I hadn’t felt in weeks, “It’s over between me and Bryant.”

Christine stared at me in disbelief before finally speaking, “Are you sure about this?”

I replied affirmatively, “Yeah.”

It had been seven years. Seven years of genuine affection wasted on someone who never showed the slightest concern, not even once. It was laughable how I envied Margaret every time Bryant lost his temper with her.

It was just too pitiful.

And I know, deep down, he would get stirred by Margaret all the time. If I didn’t come to my senses today, he would eventually. So, why demean myself any further?

Christine suddenly raised an eyebrow. “Talk about a silver lining. A car accident knocked some sense into you. I should’ve gotten you into one sooner.”

“What about the baby? Does he know about the baby?” Christine began to ponder the logistics of the divorce.

“He doesn’t know.” A bitter smile played on my lips as I replied, “I was planning to tell him today.”