The CEO’S Orphan Wife

I refrained from returning to our room at the moment. Instead, I spent some time in the garden and came back once I was certain that Ivan was asleep.

With each passing day, the burden I carry grows heavier and heavier.

Honestly, I’m causing harm to myself with my actions. Rachelle was right; I truly became a self-sacrificing individual in matters of love.

However, all of this is temporary. Soon, I’ll be leaving this house. I’ll be leaving Ivan. And eventually, everything will become a part of the past, memories to look back on and laugh about.

For now, Ivan needs me, so I’ll stay to take care of him. I’m still his wife until I leave, and he said he’s going to file for an annulment.

I looked up and gazed at the sky, filled with stars, while the moon was round and bright.

“How are you up there in heaven, Mom and Dad?”

I recalled when my grandfather passed away when I was still young. My mom mentioned that he went to the moon, and from there, he watched over the ones he loved. Now, he’s with my mom and dad.

“If you hadn’t passed away, perhaps I wouldn’t be in this situation… Maybe we would have been happy. I would have pursued my dreams.” But things changed. It’s beyond my control. All I can do now is stick to the plan-to stay sane until it’s over.

“I’ll be fine, Mom and Dad. I’ll be fine. I promise…”

Feeling the chill in the air, I made the choice to head indoors. Ivan is most likely asleep by now.

***

I observed Ivan’s serene expression while he slept. Even in slumber, he still appeared a bit stern because of the crease on his forehead, as if he carried his worries even into his sleep.

I gently moved my face closer to his and planted a tender kiss on his cheek. I closed my eyes, allowing my lips to linger on his soft and smooth skin for a few seconds.

“What are you doing?”

Startled, I quickly moved away from him. His eyes remained closed, and when he finally opened them, our gazes locked. He wore a serious expression, and I couldn’t discern whether he was upset with my actions.

“Uh… N-Nothing,” I stammered, avoiding direct eye contact.

I attempted to create some distance between us, but he suddenly gripped my wrist. It felt like a scene from a Korean drama, with everything slowing down, especially as my body came to fall beside his.

My eyes widened, and my lips hung open in disbelief as I gazed at him. His expression remained serious, leaving me unable to fathom his thoughts.

I tried to distance myself, but our fingers quickly intertwined. He drew me closer, cradling me in his muscular arm.

“Uh… I-I thought you were asleep,” I stammered, attempting to conceal my embarrassment.

“Hmmm?” He nestled his face against my cheek, taking in my scent deeply. I suddenly felt self-conscious. What if I smell unpleasant, and he becomes even more disenchanted with me?

Why bother? He doesn’t like you anyway, my inner critic taunted.Còntens bel0ngs to Nô(v)elDr/a/ma.Org

I remained still, scarcely breathing or shifting due to my proximity to Ivan. I bit my lip and refrained from closing my eyes as a multitude of sensations coursed through me, all due to our closeness. I could even catch a whiff of his pleasant breath.

“Ah… Go to sleep,” I nervously whispered. I’m not accustomed to him acting like this with me. I’m more used to his cold demeanor.

I’m starting to wonder, does he really have amnesia?

Absolutely! It’s likely because he wouldn’t behave like this in his previous state. He’s typically repelled by me.

“Didn’t we used to do this?” he innocently asked.

I looked at him with a hint of surprise.

“N-No… You’re the one who said that, right? That you love Maureen…” I bit my lip and tried to calm myself because it felt like reality was suffocating me. I shouldn’t have let myself get carried away.

“Not… ever?” he asked skeptically.

I shook my head.

“Even what happened between us before, you don’t remember. You were really drunk that night…”

There was a deafening silence for a moment. It’s as if he’s attempting to delve into his memory based on what I said.

“Don’t force it,” I told him. It wouldn’t be good for him to try and remember forcefully.

“Go to sleep, Ivan.” I’m not comfortable discussing this. It just makes the pain worse.

“Alright… Let’s sleep.” He kissed my cheek and embraced me even more tightly.

A few minutes passed, and he had already drifted off to sleep.

Meanwhile, I couldn’t hold back my tears. I did my best to stifle my sobs, not wanting him to witness my vulnerability. I didn’t want to exploit his amnesia; I was convinced it was merely the pity he felt for me.

And when he’s with Maureen again, he will most likely let go of me. There’s no way he’d choose me over Maureen.

As he relaxed his grip on me, I seized the opportunity to distance myself from him. I stood up and sat down, silently observing my husband as tears continued to stream from my eyes.

I believed I was strong. I believed I could endure, but I’m still fragile. My love for him continues to sap my strength.

Can I truly distance myself from you? Can I leave you? Can I live far away from you?

Ivan… Why can’t it be me instead? Why can’t you choose me? I love you. And I can love you better than Maureen can.

I wiped the tears from my cheeks and took a deep breath.

But I am not Maureen. I’m not the woman your heart beats for.

I massaged my temples, shaking my senses back into place.

Get it together. You can’t be weak. How can you leave and go away if your mind keeps changing about this?